Good Evening, Mr. and Mrs. America and All the Ships At Sea

PLEASE NOTE:  "Ships at sea" really have nothing to do with this post.  It just had a nice ring to it.

Dear residents of Hilltown, Silverdale, Perkasie, East Rockhill, West Rockhill, Sellersville, and Bedminster,
  This is the first of what I hope to be a series of observations about the area I call home.  And not just because most of my stuff is here and I just paid off the pool.
  In the virtual pages of this blog, I will be providing you with a collection of those bon mots (French for candied mots) about what it is which makes Pennsylvania's Upper Bucks County one of the finest places in which to live (please note:  I did not end my sentence with a preposition.  You're welcome).  Along the way, of course, I'll also comment on things which strike me as odd, funny, strange, weird, or which belong in Congress.
  For example, did you ever notice that the covered bridge which spans the Perkiomen Creek adjacent (NOTE: snooty word for "next to") to a soccer field and parking lot has a sign on it which says it was built in 1874?  Yes, yes, I know the original bridge was built then, but it was destroyed by fire (more specifically, dopey arsonists) soon after the Y2K frenzy (remember that? Ahhhh, good times).
  The good fathers (which sounds eminently more polite than good mothers) of East Rockhill decided to rebuild it.  Bravo, I said.  As tragic as the heinous act was, that span was due for a redesign, I said.    
  So, they did.  A grand reopening was held in 2009 with funnel cake, livestock, Bono, and I think that Amish comic guy.
  Please don't think this will be a diatribe on the "wisdom" of rebuilding it exactly how it was.  No, no, that would be too easy.  It wasn't their fault that "Bridge Building For Dummies" was checked out of the Pierce Branch library that day.
  What I find amusing is that the new bridge still has the original sign stating it was built in 1874.  Which just ain't true.
  Imagine tourists from, oh, say, Ohio who, deciding to get a jump on the crowds, are on a leaf-peeping trip in July.  Deciding they needed to get a drink at Giant, a pizza from Dominos, and their nails done at that...uh...nail place (I don't go there so, ergo, I don't recall its name):
  "Gee, Martha, ain't that somethin'?  Those Pennsylvania master craftsmen built bridges to last.  This thing is over 235 years old!  But, why is the dang road only one-way??"
  I'm quite sure the local poobahs have a perfectly good explanation for putting that sign up.  I just hope it wasn't because they ran out of money to buy a new sign.  Gotta put that turf field in at the high school, dontcha know.
  Anyway, yeah, this is the kind of stuff I plan on writing for your reading enjoyment.  Or because there's nothing on television in the summer.
  Who knows?  Maybe you'll see yourself here.  Then, you can shoot me the name of that nail place.
best fishes,
Ken